You are the fearless leader of your family.
You ROCK at work.
You ROCK at home.
You hold it all together until…
All of a sudden it all comes crashing down.
You’re stressed to the max, exhausted and stretched SO thin that you wind up standing in your kitchen crying because you just can’t do it all anymore.
YUP… That was me.
We all want to be Supermom. Logically, we know we can’t do everything and take care of everybody, but as I’ve said before, we are not always the most logical people, right?!
I honestly thought that everyone would benefit so much more if I did everything I could to help everyone.
“What happens if I’m not on my A game alllll the time and taking care of absolutely everything that I possibly can? Will the world fall apart? Or worse, will someone be disappointed in me?”
So I took on ALL the cooking, ALL the laundry, ALL the dishes. ALL of my projects at work, ALL the volunteering. And then I was there for ALL the bedtimes and ALL family game nights and… Can you see why burnout set in?!
The thing is… we are destined for burnout and failure when we try to do it all. The BEST part about all of this is that when we take off that Supermom cape and stop trying to take on everything, others truly DO benefit.
WHO BENEFITS when you STOP STRIVING FOR SUPERMOM:
Obviously WE benefit from not having the stress of doing everything and feeling responsible for everyone, but I know for me… I’m much more motivated when I see that a change I’m going to make is actually going to benefit someone else.
So, let’s look at this in 2 different aspects:
1. When you keep the cape on…
Think about who gets hurt when you snap. When you’re putting way too much pressure on yourself and all of a sudden it just boils over and you snap. You probably hurt your husband’s feelings, you hurt your kids’ feelings, and YOU end up feeling horrible too in the process.
If we take off some of that pressure that we put on ourselves to be Supermom, we would avoid all of that pain for our family and for ourselves.
2. When you realize you can’t do it all…
~~~ It can strengthen your marriage. When I lean on my husband and I’m clear in my communication with him that I just can’t do it all, it makes our relationship stronger.
Sure, he loves it when I take care of stuff around the house – he’s super appreciative of that. But he never expects me to get everything done and take care of everybody.
Sometimes showing our own “imperfections” comforts other people because then they feel like they don’t have to live up to that crazy-high bar that you’re setting for yourself. That open communication can really strengthen your marriage!
~~~ The other aspect of who benefits comes into play when you have someone else watch your kids. Of course, you could be Supermom and always be with your kids and always be taking care of them. But then this would never happen…
It creates so many fun MEMORIES for your kids AND for the person who is taking care of them. Any time I would ask someone else to take care of the kids, I used to feel really hesitant about it because I never wanted to have them feel like they had to say yes. I didn’t want to burden them with taking care of my kids.
But over time, I realized that being away from my kids from time to time was giving them the opportunity to create so many fun memories!
Moral of the Story:
Take off the cape.
Release those expectations of yourself.
Let’s all stop striving for Supermom together!!!
~ Lacey ~